Behavior Modification Plans

 This is how you know that your job may have interfered with your real life:  When you start your own behavior modification plan.  I mean, seriously.  Ridiculousness or not - I probably really can be motivated by things like pedicures, facials and massages.  So, here I come big weight loss - I could really use some more time at Fox & Hounds (and Crissy really wants her gift card to Borders or iTunes).  I have about another 17ish pounds until the first pedicure....awesome!

I need more money...

That's the story of my life.  Check out this beautiful wedding band:

  

It pretty much encompasses everything I could possibly want.  Crissy likes it, too - that's not the problem.  The price tag is the problem.  That seems to be the resounding theme lately.....so sad.  But, just in case you have an extra $2,000 and want to buy me one (or really, let's be honest - an extra $4,000 so Crissy and I can have matching bands), here's the link:  Beautiful Wedding Band.

Can You Put a Price on Beauty?

The answer is yes, yes you can.  And, sometimes that price is significantly higher than I would assume.  For instance, this lovely bouquet:

I mean, it's GORGEOUS.  In fact, I think it's insanely stunning.  Plus, it would never die - it's silk.  That makes it even better.  But, it's price tag?  Not so much.  This lovely little bouquet is $1,200.  Not $120...but $1,200.  That's insane.  I think I'll just go back to the whole Farmer's Market hand-tied bouquet idea....

We have a winner!

So, Crissy and I had found a dress that we really liked for Kristy and Darci to wear for the wedding.  It was casual, but just formal enough to fit the wedding.  It was a lovely deep chocolate brown with a caramel trim.  I'd totally wear it.  It's a good thing I didn't have my heart so set on it...you know, like I do sometimes.  Because then I'd just be disappointed when things don't work out exactly like they've been in my head.

After an hour of the sales lady (Jana, perhaps?) thinking Crissy and I were getting married on separate days - but apparently shopping with our respective bridesmaids and selecting the same dresses (weird, right?), we came to a conclusion....The dress we'd picked, as lovely as it was, was not a winner.  It's pretty in a picture - and in person.  However, neither Darci nor Kristy were overly comfortable in it - or loved it - or whatever.  So, after multiple dresses tried, they both tried the one to the left.  Kristy actually picked it out.  It's definitely more formal than we thought we'd have...but if both of them are comfortable, like the dress, and it works with everything - then we're happy.  So, we're happy....not to mention the fact that they both seem happy with it.  In the end, we'll let them choose whether they keep it long like it is or have it altered to be shorter and more knee length.  Also, Jana (we'll call her that now - whether it's really her name or not) finally realized that while we both acknowledged we were the brides....we were actually marrying each other.  Okay, so technically it took Kristy spilling the beans after Jana referenced our wedding dayS....but still.  Though, while I think she was embarassed - there was nothing more to it than that.  So, congratulations Jana from Bobbie's Bridal - I think we'll order all wedding dresses (both of ours and the maid of honor dresses) through you!

 Here's the original dress, in case you're curious:

We should also mention that we're winners because of Kristy and Darci.  It's really that simple.  They each are pretty signficant to us - and it would be crazy to be having this wedding without them.  So, while we hope they know how much they mean to us (individually - and together), we're making our love and appreciation of them public with this.  :)  So, thank you - to both of you - for your love, support and being pretty awesome friends.  Thanks also for trying on dresses Saturday morning and being troopers!

And, not to leave out anyone else....we're pretty much winners because of every single one of our friends and family.  I'm feeling particuarly sappy lately and have been overwhelmed by my gratitude of the wonderful people in my life.  So, thanks to all of you for your love, support - and just by being you, in whatever way that is.

Compromise

Relationships are about compromise, right?  Well, Crissy and I are on it.  We're pretty good at compromising - and finding something that will make both of us happy.  Well, today's compromise did include that - but meant doing double workouts.  Crissy wanted to run the 5k route at Tipton....and I wanted to do BodyPump at the gym.  So, we did both.  The bonus is that we got cardio and weights in....the downside?  I'm exhausted at the moment.  I wish dinner would magically make itself.

In completely other and random news - check out how beautiful this is.  If we were getting married on a beach in Mexico (Puerto Vallarta, to be exact), this is exactly how it should look.  It's so amazing!

Neckties

These have nothing to do with the wedding - but I think they're pretty great.  It's amazing what people can do with a whole variety of things.  I would totally wear any one of these things....

Jerkface & A Wedding Dress

Ever have one of those days where you have to apologize for being a jerkface?  I read this blog the other day ("Can I get a hug?"), which I think summed up how I feel some days.  You know, where you have the crankiest day ever, take it out on the person you love, and then have to apologize for being the biggest cranky jerkface ever.  Seriously, read the link to that one post....it saves me the time from having to write it all.  Today wasn't one of those days....but we definitely have them.

In other news, I found out today that my grandma has my mom's wedding dress.  I didn't know it existed anywhere anymore.  But, leave it to my grandma.  I don't know how she's acquired all of these things of my mom's.  For instance, my grandma used to have the china that my mom and dad had when married (I actually know how she got that) - and she then gave it to me after my mom passed away and I bought my house with the lovely built-in china cabinet.  But, in the midst of the last 30-some-odd years, my grandma still has the wedding dress my mom wore....Labor Day weekend....  I am now diving into looking at different dress options in an effort to find a way to incorporate pieces of my mom's dress.  I just remember lots of lace from the one picture I have around here somewhere.  So, I re-saw a dress that I've really liked all along and saw how the lace could be incorporated...it's just a matter of talking to someone who could make it happen.

It's funny how fated I feel Crissy and I are to be together....and how my mom has found ways to work herself into our plans.  It just makes me feel like she's more present than I probably give her credit for....and makes me wonder if Crissy and I are even more destined for each other than even I would think.

Reasoning

I'll have to come back to a post about our party another time....there's definitely some good stuff to blog about.  After countless suggestions of new last names, we can't just forego the engagement party recap post.  However, this is what's on my mind right now.

Maybe you wonder why exactly we're getting married or having an actual wedding ceremony.  I mean, it's not like our union will be recognized in the state of Illinois.  And, if Bill Brady gets elected - it will be even longer.  On top of that, perhaps you wonder why we're supporting the institution of marriage.  I mean, lots of marriages fail - and we live in a country that doesn't (as a whole) view a marriage like ours as legitimate.  So, why the hell would we do it?  Well, I view it as a really simple answer - because we love each other and we want to.

Here's the deal:  I love Crissy and I love weddings.  So, it seems simple to me - combine the two for one fantastic day.  Beyond that, Crissy wants a wedding.  You know, some girls want weddings.  We happen to be two of those girls.  This wedding is a way for us to share our love with our friends and family.  It's a way to have all of you be a part of our life.  It's a way for us to legitimize our relationship - in our way.  It doesn't have to be in anybody else's way.  It doesn't even have to make sense to other people.  And, it doesn't have to be legitimate in Illinois to be legitimate to us.  We're not having a wedding for the piece of paper.  We're getting married because we love each other - because we want to spend our lives together.  This is just an outward way of letting others know that, and be a part of it.  Do I wish Illinois recognized same sex marriages?  Hell yes.  But, am I going to let the fact that it doesn't stop me from marrying the person I love?  Hell no.  It is what it is.

I love Crissy and can't wait to spend the rest of my life with her.  I'm excited that I already get that just by living with her.  But, I'm also really excited to have a day full of great dresses, fantastic food, fun music & dancing, plus a million other little details - and sharing our love with all of our loved ones.  It's why we're having a smaller wedding (like under 70 people kind of smaller) - it makes it seem much more like it's about our love and being surrounded by your love.  It might sound a little cheesy to talk about being surrounded by your love - but we're only inviting close friends and family....we're super appreciative of the love and support in our lives, so cheesy it is.

So, with that being said - I may post 400 entries between now and the wedding about little details....about flowers, napkins, dresses, shoes, food, lighting and more.  BUT, none of that takes away from my love for Crissy - or means that I'm only excited about yet another event to plan.  I do love planning events - and I always will.  But, I love Crissy more and that's why I'm marrying her.

Engagement Party Day!!!

The day is finally here - engagement party day!  Crissy and I have completed almost everything we need to do for tonight.  We're just down to one last run to the store, a dip to be made, and then getting ourselves prettied up.  All of the little details have turned out great - I'm so excited for all of it!!!  We spent the morning with the wonderful Ariel who tried to capture the essence of "us" and our relationship on camera.  I can't wait to see all the photos when she's done with them.  Thanks Ariel for being awesome and spending the morning with us!  

Since you're all just now accessing this (since we kept it a big secret), here's the link to the first blog post:  "Serendipity".  Enjoy your reading and getting to know us (and our plans for the wedding) better!

Thanks for all of your support - we love you all!

Love, Crissy and Trish

For the love of burlap

I love burlap.  I've actually always kind of liked the look of it, though this whole wedding planning thing with our thoughts for next year have increased my love of burlap.  Check out these ideas:

I can really see all of the little details - and how it all fits together.  I can't wait for next September when it can all be put into action and all come together. 

Woo Hoo!

Crissy and I just spent the last day or so in Chicago supporting Kristy as she ran her Marathon.  While there were a few momentary periods of "I don't wanna," she finished!!!  Way to go, Kristy!!!

In other news, we're only one short week away from our engagement party.  We still have some things left to do, but we're even more excited now than before.  Ariel joined us in the city this morning and we got to chat a little about engagement pictures for next Saturday morning and show her a few of the ideas we've had.  She seems excited - and I know I'm pretty stinking excited for it all to happen, too.  Now, to pick out our outfits....  While we were up in Chicago with Kristy and headed up multiple escalators to the Expo on Saturday - Kristy asked Crissy and I what we were doing with our last names.  Then proceeded to give suggestions which combined both of our last names.  Things like "Heffalot" or "Malren."  Yeah, these ideas stink....but it did give us the idea to incorporate this into our engagement party.  So, I think we're going to do something where our friends and family give suggestions for us to choose from.  We'll see.

Check out these bouquets that I saw on a blog earlier: 

In other news, with only 6 short days until the engagement party, I have exactly 3 pounds to lose - or so says Sam.  As of Saturday morning, I had lost something in the vicinity of 9 pounds and 2-ish% body fat.  Sam set a goal that I would lose 12 by our party - and I'm pretty stinking close.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed.  She did kick our asses with a BodyAttack class Saturday morning and we walked lots of miles this morning.  If I keep this up, I could virtually reach my ultimate weight loss goal by the wedding.  That's an insane thought to me, really.

Happy Sunday - let's hope this week goes faster than last (last week was sloooow)!!!

Dear Dad,

In case you read this and are wondering what to get me for a wedding present (you know, besides your love, support and that financial help), I thought I would supply you with this pictoral representation.  Now, I know you might wonder how the heck this is possible at your house.  And, well, that's a really valid point.  But, seeing as how you're "dad" - I figure you can work some magic.  So, I know you might be trying to be in denial about the lighting of this wedding....sadly, I'm trying to break through that denial.  Because, check out this picture - I'm pretty sure you'll agree that it makes for a lovely wedding reception.  So, if you can somehow make this happen (for a super small amount of money) - that would be swell.

You're the best.

Love,

Trish

Excitement!!!

Today, Crissy and I spent some time discussing food and a menu for our reception.  We're pretty fortunate - her boss has offered to prepare all of the food for us.  Cheri is amazing, needless to say.  So, Cheri came prepared with far more ideas than I would have thought of.  The menu is bound to be fabulous - and I can't wait!  It will be a wonderful blend of cold and hot hors d'oeuvres, seasonal tastes and just pure deliciousness.  One suggestion I made were for these stuffed baby squash.  The picture to the left isn't stuffed as ours would be - but aren't they just so freakin' cute?!?!  Also, thanks to Cheri, I now have it in my head that we need a chocolate fountain at our reception - complete with fruit and pound cake....and delicious, beautiful, flowing chocolate. 

The save the date cards are almost done.  We have most of them assembled - and the fun magnet making will take place next week.  We're SOO excited for the engagement party next weekend!

I found some wedding pictures of a couple on the big gay wedding website today that are really just lovely.  I don't so much care for the "portrait" pictures of the whole family - but the ones of the two brides are wonderful.  They make me think of some of the space out at my parent's house - and I'm just thinking of the possibilities for pictures - I bet they'll be gorgeous.  Our delightful and wonderful friend, Ariel, has agreed to take our pictures - and I have no doubt that she'll find a way to capture all of it beautifully.


Check out this picture I found for an idea for a guest book.  I love it!!  Each guest paints a square - to make up one larger picture. Doesn't it sound great to have something artistic that can capture and represent all of the friends and family who love and support us?

Man, we have some great parents!

Yesterday was a day to be thankful for our parents.  Not that there aren't other days, but yesterday was one of them.  Crissy's family spent the day doing Spoon River Drive, which means loads of garage sales and flea market like activities.  We didn't go along, but instead put her mom on a hunt for aqua mason jars.  Clearly I need to put her on more such "hunts" because check out what she managed to get for us for only $10:

While Crissy's family was Spoon River Driving it all day, we went and visited my parents - just to catch up since it had been a while and also to take some pictures, check out where we might want things set up, etc... My parents were pretty great and discussed the amount they'll be donating to the wedding (which wasn't entirely expected, so it's pretty spectacular that they're helping out) and also took us to dinner.  Plus, we shared a few ideas with them - and they (well, technically, Linda) were pretty excited about some of our plans.  Linda is in love with the hairstyle I want for the wedding (yet to be divulged to the blog world) and told me I have to do it!  We also decided on where in the yard we'll have the wedding, which is pretty exciting.  Before you take about 3 steps down into the yard, you'll see this:

And, this is the lovely little spot we've selected for the ceremony location.  It's pretty much straight in front of you once you walk down the few steps - but we love the two trees and will stand between them.

We tentatively also discussed where we'll be placing tables for the reception - and I think it will mean that some people are spread out, but everyone will still be in pretty close proximity to one another.  Having a pool in the middle of all of this will be beautiful - but also means we can't seat people TOO close to the pool....I'd hate to have someone scoot back their chair to get up and inadvertently fall in.  Ooops.  Here's a pic of one of the areas where tables will be set up.  The pool is to the right - just on the other side of the shrubbery - and the wedding will be to the left, on the other side of the fence.

Yesterday was big for other reasons, too.  We decided to change the date of the wedding - thankfully before we printed the save the date cards.  We're moving it to Labor Day weekend - for a few reasons.  The primary reason being that we just don't want it to be too cold.  While yesterday was a week after when our wedding would be, it was freezing out at my parents even in late afternoon - which means people would be freezing all kinds of things off come 5:00 when we'd planned on the ceremony starting.  So, Labor Day makes more sense for the weather being a smidge warmer.  Beyond that, it's a long weekend - it means we'd always get extra time for an anniversary weekend - but more than that, we figure it means people might be able to celebrate with us a little longer and I might be able to do the fun Sunday picnic idea that I posted before.  To top of the reasoning for Labor Day, my mom and dad were married over Labor Day weekend about 33 some odd years ago.  While their marriage didn't work out so well to one another, not having my mom physically be able to be there makes me feel like maybe she'd be more connected to the wedding if it's the same weekend as their wedding.  It might not really make any sense to others - or really be the case, but it's how it feels to me.....so lots of reasons for Labor Day - hooray!  

We also decided to nix the margaritas from the drink list.  Okay, so you all don't know what the original drink list was - but after much discussion with my parents yesterday and then discussion on the drive home, endless margaritas, cranberry & vodka, and beer might just do us in financially with the friends and family we have.  :)  So, we're going to substitute wine for the margartias - which I know will make at least a few people who love wine very happy.

Happy Sunday!!!

"Okay, you ready to get pizza?"

Believe it or not, this post will be describing the day that Trish asked me to be her "forever lady."  Yes, I said, "Forever lady."  In case you didn't know already, we are not exactly what some would call traditional.  Having said that, we had previously discussed how we both felt awkward at the idea of asking the other the all too traditional "Will you marry me?"  Hence, "Will you be my forever lady?" developed. 

Okay, back to the topic.  It was July 30th, the day before my birthday and honestly, I had been wondering if Trish would be proposing to me on my birthday.  I had an inkling that she had already purchased the ring about a week earlier, when we went to look at rings and the one I had picked out was no longer there.  But as said, it was Friday, July 30th and we made plans to have a nice, relaxing evening by picking up a pizza and renting a movie.  Interestingly enough to me though, was when she received a call and said she needed to go somewhere and then would be picking me up to go get the pizza.  I wondered if she was getting the ring, but by no means was I expecting her to ask me that night.  So she picked me up at home and we were on our way to pick up the pizza...and then she placed an envelop on my lap.   I am certain I looked at her with a confused look on my face as she told me to open it and to read the cards aloud.  There were 8 cards and each one had a question about us on them.  Fortunately, I got all of the answers about us right :)  Honestly, as I was reading and answering them, I felt an emotion come over me that I don't think I've ever experienced before.  I felt so incredibly happy...that feeling that everything had fallen into place like it should and of being so happy that I felt like crying.  Then I read the last card, which asked where we were when I traced the trapezius on her back (it's a large back muscle and apparently as we were getting to know one another, I was lame and tried to impress her with my random knowledge...yep you guessed it...I'm smooth like that)  As I read this, she pulled up along side Franklin Park and parked.  This is where I not only traced this muscle on her back, but is where we would meet and go for walks as we got to know one another.  When we got out of the car, we walked just as we had in the very beginning of what would become "us."  We walked to the center of park and at this point, Trish took my hand, and honestly I don't remember exactly what was said because I was overwhelmed with happiness, and asked me to be her forever lady as she placed the ring on my finger.  Of course I said yes and we hugged and sat on the bench for a bit while I admired the beautiful bling on my finger...I never thought I'd be so excited about bling :)  Honestly though, I couldn't be happier. 

Here's a picture of the ring...